Hey people.. (:
you knw.. i've been thinking so much lately.. and i've realised something.. July wasn't a really really good month for me.. Honestly, i'd admit that there were more downs than ups in this month.. whenever i try to turn to somthing.. i'll lose it.. awkward and maybe it don't really make sense.. but yeah, i'm living in the world of impossible, awkward and "oh, that's complicated and don't make sense at all " . Honestly.. i'm living it now.. and honestly.. i really didn't knew how i reacted or overcame all this in this last few days or in this month.. and now, i'm left with a few more days before august comes. It hurts big time to just take a stroll down memory lane right now cause it just won't do me any good.. i don't know.. here's a brief pic.. when i felt as if love has just walked out on me and never coming back.. i turned to the next purest thing in my life, soccer.. and suprisingly within 2 days, i got injured.. 2 weeks out, meniscus knee injury.. what can i say.. i can't kick a ball, dribble, or even run... and recently, i've been putting up a fake smile lately just to show everyone that i'm alright.. but if you look closer.. then yes, you'll see. It's not easy waking up everyday knowing that things has change and your gone.. Probably, gone to better things and a better life.. i don't know.. but have you ever wondered how i felt? have you? i've been feeling so weak at the start and right now, i should feel stronger instead there's still this sore feeling i get every now and then.. people say move on, but my heart just craves even more.. why? i don't know? did i try? try to move on? yes, of course.. but i've also learnt another thing, nothing is stronger than our hearts.. nothing can win it, not even our mental nor physical strength can even come near it. Because, it has that ability to just gives you that feeling that makes you even weaker than you were yesterday.. Yeah, i know.. i may sound weak but honestly, not as weak as before.. and why's that? because it took me one month just to understand every single thing that seem so unreasonable yet so true.. And also, it took me one month just to get this heart of mine to get use to things without you.. however, it just always seem to crave for you even more after looking into your eyes. It's as if you spoke right through me and i dont knw how your able to do that. You can deny my feelings that i have... and yeah, i've ever denied this feelings that i'm having too.. but how can i after feeling like this over and over again.. i can't deny this heart of mine, and yeah.. she craves for you every now and then.. but , i can't give her what she wants or needs and that's you.. So how do you expect me to run or quit? all i can do is hide.. because, quiting or running would just be a love suicide.

my apology for this post and being not active in posting. Sorry..
but guys, do bear with me. soon, hopefully...


HEYY! (:
ohhh i my twisted me ain't doing me any good... gosh. well, i didn't went to sch today.. simply because i coudn't walk.. made my way to jalan besar stad to see the physiotherapist. Had this kinda electric thingy go through my knee... But it didnt hurt.. just feel like ants crawling.. hahahah ohhhh well... i should go (:



You roll out of bed
and went down on your knees
and for a moment you can hardly breathe.
Wondering was she really here?


Heyyy.. hahah.
well.. i had my english N level oral today.. and i suppose it turned out good.. (: ermm, no worries.. cause i knw that i gave my best.. now there's MLB to look forward too... sigh. Oh and 31st July, Dnt submission.. gosh.. time flies way way toooo fast. well.. also, i've twistes my freaking knee.. hurts like shit. seriously... wow, first it was the ankle.. now, knee.. life just don't get better huh? well.. just a random post.. (:

You know that it's over when the burning and the yearning inside your heart ain't there anymore.
And you know that you're through when she don't do to you and move you like the way she moved you before. You wanna pull her close, but your heart has froze.
You kiss her but her eyes don't close.
Then she goes out of your heart forever and it hurts you but you know that it's better.


I realised there's no end in sight .
Yet still i wait, for you to see the
light.


A million memories recalled..
from the first day to the last.
Though it's only for a while..
everything that happened just seem so
priceless. It seem as if it all can never
happen again.. And the best part is
because it's all priceless, i can never buy it
back, in fact.. there's no way in getting it all
back. Why? because it was all priceless..
That was how special every single moment
i spent with you was to me..
It's funny how you could just control a guy
like me.. For a moment i felt as if i was under water..
and i didn't know what to do. Or where to turn to.. not untill..
you came.. and then, i realised i was above the water, gasping
for that air i've been dying for.. The next, i felt as if i was floating..
and finally, i thought of walking on water.. and i tried.. a few times..
and.. i can't.. i kept drowning.. however.. everytime i tried and
everytime i fall.. you picked me up.. and i floated, again.. But people do dream
and people do believe.. so i continued.. without hesitating cause i thought,
i thought that all this persevering would eventually guide me to somewhere
which seem so impossible but yet, so true.. however, i realised that though we
perservere alot.. and fail again.. and again..
we tend to be too stubborn to let go of what we wanna achive..
sometimes, we just gotta know when to let go..
Maybe, just maybe.. if i don't stop.. i would end up drowning and you might
not even be there to pick me up again..
And though i've lost myself in not persevering.. i'm still alive, and somehow..
though i'm a loser.. i felt like a winner..
You helped me gasp for that last breath i was dying for.. and what seemed to be
my last breath, seemed to be the breath i'll be taking for the next seconds, minutes
and hours. And i'm thankful you came..
Though the truth and the decision i made hurts me alot.
I've done this all for love.
And i hope i'll walk away with no regrets...
Because, i believe so far.. you've been the best. And i've never felt this strongly
about anyone before.. But like they say.. time will heal..

A really talented musician. He has the flair, that spark and that entertainment value every fan craves for. I believe he has been an idol to many musicians out there and truly, honestly.. the world has lost one of their biggest music icons. Rest in peace Mr Michael Jackson.

Yes! it has been awhile... hahah but yeah.. i've been really busy with a whole lotta things.. especially dnt. Well.. this week has been one wild rollercoaster ride.. Though i've felt twisted so many times.. it always seems to turn out okay at the end of the day. (: hahah and to mention this i just remembered smth, this phrase... there are always sunshine after the rain. (: sounds familiar? hahahah yeah.. i've been told that a few months back after shanring my medical issue to one of my close friends who right now is someone really special to me. (: hahaha what? people do grow closer... hahah well, went to church today with jerome.. had lunch with shane and ltr on met reg.. hanged around with her for quite awhile and then headed back.. (: ermm, overall.. i would say the week ended kinda nicely.. well, i hope my coming week won't be as twisted as this week's.. well, everyone has obstacles.. this is just one of those obstacles.. (: well, we'll see.. (:

If love's gonna be so straight

forward and simple..

there wouldn't be bitter and sweet moments.

And without them, will love still exist?

But no one said it was gonna be easy.

It's gonna twist and turn you.

Question is..

how am i or how are we

gonna react to it?

You might wanna run,

but trust me..

i won't let you do that. (: