I never made time, You never made much sense
We never stood a chance, If we're honest.

You were not the first,
And I won't be the last,
But if it makes it better,
Well you can call me what you will.

Get home late,No one's here.
Pace around the houseAnd sit in my chair.
And if you think of me,It doesn't mean a thing.
So why don't you just tell me
What you really think again?

I don't care what you call me
Because it won't hurt any more.
I know I let you down,
And Christ, you let me know Every time
And time again.
Just another afternoon
Get drunk and disappear

So call me what you will
Rain it on down.
What else can you throw at me
I haven't heard before?

And tear me on down.
I am unforgivable.
So why don't you just tell me
What you really think of me?
And scream me on down

I am so forgettable
Yes, I know.
And shoot me on down
Don't you think this isn't killing me?
But it's no more than I deserve.
I don't care what you call me.
Because it won't hurt any more.


wooooo! my DnT is finally all sumitted. ((:

Goodbye, artifact.

Goodbye, Journal.

Goodbye, PBs.

Goodbye, Researches and Ideations! hahaha.

Ohh, i feel really accomplised this time. Proud of my work. big time. be it the result. What a rollercoaster ride i had with my dnt. And now, let's hope results will turn out well. andd. I'll be heading that i'll be heading to sec 5 nx year.. i hopeeeeeeeeeee. (:



But firstly,

Thank you lord for being with me through all this time and guiding me whenever i've doubts and troubles. Please do continue guide me as i approach my N and O level examinations.

Amen. (:



Ohhh, wow. that's a first. hahaha.

and now, it's time to prepare for all those theories. N level's in 2 weeks and counting daown every each and passing day. so, yeap. a million preparations needed. But, time's on my side. I just gotta focus.. and i'll pull through. I pray! hahaha

okay, i'll go and slack a little before hitting on my maths homework.

The task here is to finish the paper by today! though it's homework.. i should. (:

Then.. i'll do a little SS. chapt 2. at least!

hahaha i'll start at 9. With the accompany of a cup of tea. coool eh ? hahah



you've Ran, Hide and eventually, Cried when you just coudn't take it anymore. You kept it all inside you and relied on your friends to find that laughter you've been dreading for and to smile like you have never smiled before. But tell me, could we? could you? could i? sometimes, keeping it all inside would just tear you apart. Everyone gets hurt. It's a routine for some. But running or hidding can't be an option for us if we wanna get out of this misery just feel the way we did yesterday. Would i admit i'm not alright? would you admit you were ashamed? would we admit we're lousy? i don't think so. But if we did. Maybe somebody would realised all these pain and maybe, take it all away. Who's that special someone we would trust? Well, find out. Life's all about mysteries. And we won't solve it unless we try to take risk. So, quit hiding and find yourself. You'll realise that not everything around you could hurt you but in fact, make you. (:



By the way..

happy 16th bithday shane! hahaha


Helloo!!
ohohoh. ive finish dnt artifact and PB now down to journal! (:
i feel damn accomplised i sweaaaaar! 3 months and finally its all almost done.
Feels like the year's coming to an end huh? everything's is like the final task.
Final exams, Final project, Final this . Final that. hahaha. wow.
Oh, and i've ran today. and knw whaaat? i'm damn happy. My fitness seems there. Tuesday tarinning resumes hopefully my Knee won't give way.. Well, tomorrow i'm gonna do some final work. I'm doing flow chart for my journal now. It's the final Phase. Almost done. than maybe tmr i'll do some improving to my journal. touch up here and there. and then off to marking. wow. Time's damn precious. Ohhhhhhh. i'm done. rach. i think i've kept my winning streak.. (: But no.. i'll let a girl win this time.. if not she'll be like. HOW COULD YOU WIN A GIRL? THEN SHE'LL BE LIKE. john, not fair. i've this and that. i'm home late and daah bla bla. hahahaha okaay i'm kidding. ((:

I'm seeing bigger things for tomorrow..
i felt the tingle in my bones. and my hair stands up.
ohhh she's so electric.
yes, she lit up my life.
tricky- electric. (:


heyheyhey. (: haha.
firstly, CONGRATS JOHN! i've my atifact circuit up. i coundn't believe i manage to make all that work out. wow. Now, i'm confident. I just gotta do 10 more % of artifact work and on then it'll be 100% journal. Oh and btw, my PB is completed! wow. I'm glad. honestly. all those stress and thought of not completing it is finally all gone. in fact, i'm looking forward to the dealine, friday. I just hope nothing screws up within this few days. DnT theory really screwed me well. i've a good feeling that i'll mess up. So, failing won't be a surprise.. But hey, i've got a hot artifact and a well done journal. who needs theories you tell me. ((: So, ya. I'm gonna do journal, jouAnd i'll turn in fr the night. Did my run today. it was a long one. And fitness seems to be improving. so that's a good sign.. trainning's on wednesday so i have 10 days to make up for 2mnths. let's see how well can high intensity fitness and conditioning help.



Oh, and to end my day off. I've just beaten rach to posting again.
I'm i that good or what! tell me please. hahahah.
yes,yes people.. i'm on a streak. And it won't end so soon unless rach
bribes me. (:


hello. (:
wow. The dnt deadline's getting closer! Friday's the day and @ 6.30pm to be precise. But.. i'm planning to get my My artifact and PB MUST BE DONE BY THURDAY. and my Journal could be finish on Friday. I'm gonna skip EC on friday that's for sure.. Oh, andd i'm gonna try and finish my PB today. I gotta study for tmr dnt prelims too. And i don't know how i'm suposed to do thaaaaaaaaaat. But i'll try to squeeze in time. Well, i guess i gotta turn to my bestfriend once again. Coffee. We always meet before exams.. So i'm gonna start to "hustle" at 7. And god knows when i'll go to bed. Hopefully i'll be ready for bed by 11.30 and not later. Tomorrow, i gotta get my circuit for my artifact up and running. Plus a little varnishing. Journal at night. Thurday 100% journal. And do my final varnishing of course.. anddd On friday. my artifact should be ready. and my journal should be 90% done up. and the 10% gonna be my last minute work (:
HAHAH. ohhh i love stress sometimes but i'm sure, This one week is gonna be a memorable week when i look back ltr. so, i'm gonna make sure i'll leave this week with NO REGRETS. ((:
Think positive people. No worries. hahah.
ohhh.
i'm getting fitter by the day. My running and conditioning seems to be paying off. Hopefully, i'll be ready for trainning and high level Intesity by nx week. Anddd, prepared for the COE challenge Cup. yeap, its my last chance to prove myself that i'm deserving for a place nx year.






hahaha ohh by the way...
rach, i've blog first.. (:


heyheyhey. i am so busy withhhhh DnT. gosh... I'm not happy. Idea generation suck balls. Damn hard to sketch. plus i can't generate so many ideas. Bloooody hell. SO, how now? 4 more days to submission. Nothing done yet. PB not done. Journal not even at the right stage. Artifact is the only so-so kinda close to finsh thing. BUT, atifact has the lowest marks. see my point. I'm confirm gonna expect late nights and all. Anyway, prelims this week for dnt. which is on wednesday. Aft it i'm gonna finish my Artifact and all. i'm gonna set some target here.
PB must be done by tomorrow!! No buts No sorry. NO EXCUSES JOHN. must finsh. die die. must finish. Then journal must by pass Ideation phase by Wednesday. which is my Prelim for dnt. basket. how to study. For the artifact My electronics must be up by wednesday too! then maybe i could do some Back rest and finally varnish the damn piece. Then submit on friday.

SO PB IS DUE TOMORROW.
JOURNAL, BY PASS IDEATION ON WEDNESDAY AND 50% TO EVALUATION.
ARTIFACT CIRCUIT MUST BE UP BY WEDNESDAY. BACKREST THURDAY.
THURSDAY 80% EVALUATION ON JOURNAL DONE.
FRIDAY. VARNISHING. 100% JOURNAL EVALUATION.
FINALLY, SURRENDER THIS HELL AND GET ON WITH LIFE.


Hey. ((:
hahaha. i'm glad i've finish my task for dnt today. wow, what seem so impossible is now POSSIBLE. I'm so glad.. My first part of my journal i believe is almost close to perfect but not yet of course.. and as for my presentation board, i'm confident of finshing pg 1 and 2 tmr. And of pg 3 is just gonna take an hour to do. why? because it has the littlest presentation on it compared to the first 2 pgs of presentation boards. Oh, and for my artifact.. i've moulded my cover and done up my electric circuit with ALOT of help from my dad. hahaha shhhh. Oh, tomorrow's monday. and that means. First day of the week which means SCHHHHOOOL! but it shoudn't be that bad.. c'mon. No EC tomorrow. and i'm looking forward to finishing my dnt. i thought it's gonna be so hard finishing it but i think i'm kinda close to the finish line and i'm confident of gd results the way things are looking. (: well, so far.. so nice. andd untill my very last major paper for 2009 i wanna keep things this way. I'm pretty positive. i don't know why. but.. i'm happy that i am. Rather be positive than negative ey? (:hahah okay, it's getting late. i've got a long day tomorrow. Hope you week was as good as mine guys. ((: take care.


Firstly, thank you rachael osborne koong li wen for complimenting me on my speed. (: i'm really flattered. thank you very much.(: haha.

A little formal there.. hahah
okay. let's see what i've been up too today.. Dnt, English and SS later.
I've not finish my task for Dnt. Kinda, dissapointed but oh well. nvm, i'll try and get those task done tmr. For now, i'm gonna finish my English, followed by some SS reading. Yes, my youth will be taken away from me for the next 2-3 months. Anyway, it's for a really really good reason! Also, i've not been jogging! and i've my reasons! i'm kinda scared to go running. and i normally run at night, and right now.. it's the 7th month. hahah, you see my situation now! you do?! cool. hahaha Maybe i'll start running tmr early evening. 5 there? It's a plan.. (:
okaaay. i've got stuff to do. Hopefully all these days will be gona before i know it. Nov/Dec holidays. i want them to some real soon! i suppose to have PLANS! travelling maybe. (: ohhhh, let's see. Nothing's confirm yet. But, i always have my friends. Alot of outing. Sure of that.


Rachael Osborne called me SLOOOOW. RIGHT. hahahaha, yeap.
someone was surprised witha rose today.. AWWW. :D


and now every song reminds me of what we used to be.



I honestly hate this feeling right now. You'll feel helpless, lousy and undecided. And why am i having all this, honestly, i do know. And i really don't wanna talk about it because i've done enough. Had a little chat with lopez and drysdale during MT lesson and i just felt so undecided after that. That mix feelings i once had just suddenly came back to me. All those cravings and heart jumping moments surprisingly did came back. I don't wanna criticise all this feelings because i once lived every of that moment and i didn't complain.. so woudn't complains now be just another excuse to deny the truth? i'm not gonna lie to myself anymore. I've got to go with the flow. Go with my feelings. 3 more weeks to N levels. I can't let all these get to me. I'm on track. In fact, BACK on track. I've got two focus right now. Soccer, my passion. And studies, Life. so anymore would be a distract i guess... Nx year might be a year of travelling and stuff. I'm gonna keep life simple. I don't deserve too much. Maybe, i'm that kinda guy who does certain stuff other normal guys don't do because we were dedicated to somthing since young. I'm used to this kind of life. I was once scared to change life a little bit. And now, i'm afraid of trying to do that.


R square= cute
John x Hint= Not Fun
John x (Hint+10)= boring surprise tmr.
hahaha.
well, these were some of rachael's and mine vry own math equations! (:
cool huh? hahah.

wow, it's been real hectic at schoool. especially with deadlines, countdowns, exams, mock paper, results, worry, this and that. And i won't say i'm enjoying life right now. But i'm trying to get the best out of everything. You know, it sucks to know that there's something that's pulling you down when you just wanna breathe and smile. Cause eventually, you can't. 20 more days. N levels. If all goes well, sec 5. if not, i don't know. It's hard to tell where i'll be heading now. though i feel i'm on the right track. i don't wanna just scrape through sec 4 and go to sec 5. In fact, i wanna do better. my aim, 15 points or below. let's see how thing's goes. (:


Hey people.
hahaha. awwww, tmr's school. And lesson's gonna resume as per normal. Oh and my knee is still killing me softly. It hurts like hell and it's a come and go thing. Oh shit, and i'm expected to return to trainning tomorrow but how? it still hurts. Nevermind.. i'll talk to coach. i should start jogging instead my fitness endureance is totally ZERO. yes. 0. so i gotta get my fitness back up.
Oh, and results might be tomorrow. Goodluck to me. God bless every paper i'm about to receive. Be it the results, i tried my best and if my best is not good enough i'm gonna work harder and of course achieve better i hope. (: Well. This should be it. (:
Because i need to move on.
Because i need to find myself once again.
You'd be happier, and i believed every single word
you told me before you move aside and went your own way.
Probably, your right. It'll be best like this. Moving on with our
lives. It wasn't easy for me but i took my time to understand
everything that had happened between us. And maybe i'd be
moving on because...
I've loved you and they say that we should let go of the ones we love
if we need too and that is what i'm going to do. (:


heyheyhey.
well. today was a kinda so-so cool day. hahah i really enjoyed soccer in the morning. From warm up to the final whistle. We won Boy's town. 7-1 Lost to APS 2-0. The aps game was kinda unfair to us somehow. But, we honor the champions. Be it the results. Let's just have fun. So yes, congrats to APS once again. They deserve to be the winners, i guess. (: anddd, We AES soccer team i believe have gained some respect from the supporters and why is that? well. The way we approach every situation. We were serious from start to the end and we gave every team we faced out best shot. So be it we trashed them or whatsoever.. we gave them our best and i believe the teams appreciated that. So yeah, no one looked down on any team. From all that, respect was gained and i'm sure of that. Especially after the tournament when all 3 teams were exchaging handshake, somehow, i felt as if AES were the winners. And guys, well done. seriously. (: Gold silver and bronze are just colours and 1st 2nd 3rd are just numbers so what matters more on a day where we appreciate all 3 schools (boystown,aps and aes.) is too just mingle, bond have fun. and if we're lucky, we'll earn some respect and that's what we got. i felt like a winner. i don't know about my team mates. but i did. Thanks to all who supported us. I hope we didn't gave less than what's expected from us. (:


Hey there. (:
hahah. Okay. let's see.. tthere's so much to look forward to this week. Starting with, my come back. Supposely on friday. (: and Founder's day tournament is on that day. So it'll be kind of a nice come back. Injury for 1 month. Comeback friday. Playing on friday. And yes, i'm looking so forward to it. And.. DnT submission is also on friday and that i'm not looking forward to. why? because... i'm not done. So little time yet so much to do.. Oh and my prelims for N levels are oveeeeer. well.. let's see.. there's so many to look forward too and so little negativities are around.. from today it seems like august is gonna be a hell of a good month and i'm gonna hope for the comings to get better everyday. (: i'm just gonna look and focus of what's ahead of me. Yes, there's still the past but.. there's a thing call moving on which i'm learning to do right now.. (:


and hello. (:
hahah woaaaaaaaah, prelims are 2/4 done! (: there's maths p2, dnt and Malay left. but.. that's in a month time or smth except for maths.. cause that'd be o level subjects. well.. i've been out and away from football for almost 3 weeks now. and honestly.. i just miss being on that field running, passing shooting heading dribbling, yup probably anything that involves one playing soccer. And if your wondering what happen? well.. it's a meniscus injury.. nth serious, thank god. If not.. surgery.. but i got to pay the time to recover from this injury.. oh and where's the meniscus? it's on the sides of your knee cap. Yup, i twisted my knee.. hahah so i've been going for treatment(rehab) for the injury, of course. And honestly, it hurts s ah. i admit, it's painful at times sia. basket. So my passing day has been pretty so-so. hanged out with shane like always after my prelims.. and we'd hang out till like 4-5? and then ciao. (: yesyes we the cool people la. hahaha Ohoh, tomorrow.. school's gonna celebrate national day. and i dont knw if i should dress up in red. Ohhh speaking of red. okay nvm. hahahah
Oh and..
Miss Rachael Osborne. hahaha she was being really really random but still, a nice girl(: , because.. she wanted me to post about how crazy she is. But, i won't do that.. c'mon.. But, i told you your name will appear didn't i? now, there it is. BIG and CLEAR. haha.

ohh and to the many who tolerated my kinda so-so emotional side of mr johnthomas, i thank you. (: and to those who even helped me out along the way whenever i seem to go out of place, i thank you even more. (: so yes.

Shane, has a new hair cut and he looks like my uncle muthu now. But who's uncle muthu? well.. i'm sure you get the pic. right shane?! hahahaha no worries kay? still handsome boy eyh?